The Myth of Santa God -- Twelve Steps and Daily Inspirations

Bill W. from Alcoholics Anonymous
Some of us have been violently anti-religious. To others, the word “God” brought up a particular idea of Him with which someone had tried to impress them during childhood...
We looked upon this world of warring individuals, warring theological systems, and inexplicable calamity, with deep skepticism.

Today, I attended two spiritual support meetings for alcoholics – and I listened.

The first meeting discussed Step 2 of the Twelve Steps, and the word “God”. Step Two says, “We came to believe that a power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.”

As I listened, I remembered as a child being taught to believe in Santa Claus – paralleled by being taught to believe in God. Santa rewarded good little boys and girls for good behavior all year long – “you reap what you sow.” Santa kept a list, and checked it twice, going to find out who has been naughty or nice – kind of like eventually everyone will stand before God at the white throne judgment to give an account of all their “sins”. And you write a letter to Santa telling him what you wanted – “if you ask anything in faith believing, God will give it to you.”

Interesting and amazing parallels of mythology.

Fortunately it only took nine or ten years to demythologize Santa. Unfortunately, it took another twenty five years, and major helpless and hopeless depression and alcoholism before I could demythologize “God”. Santa God was my last remaining hope that someday I would stop hurting – if I could just find out his “will” – rules and demands – and then I would choose to meet them. Without Santa God, I was not waiting a year to get what I “wanted” – but an eternity.

In my hopeless and helpless state of mind and heart, I was brought to a fork in the road of my life. I would continue my useless myth of “God”, or I would risk a different course and direction. I would have to consciously face my endless shame and dread of impending doom – the expectation of getting what I believed I deserved -- or trying again – over and over – to be “good enough”.

I realize now, over twenty years later, that the lie that kept the myth of God alive was the lie of “free will” Religion traditionally has needed a “hell”, and a punishment for ‘sin” in order to operate. And consequently, it has needed “free will” and choice to justify and defend its judgment and condemnation. If a person has no choice, he or she cannot technically be held responsible. (Actually, having no choice or free will does not take away consequences only “eternal damnation” and abandonment.)

The fork in the road was between continuing to believe the religious myth of God, and moving into intimate conscious Presence with a Higher Power or spirituality. The fork was Step One of the Twelve Steps:
"We admitted we were powerless – that our lives had become unmanageable."

In my experience, I “turned” when I experienced, admitted, and accepted that I was powerless over my perceptions, reactions, and actions – I do not have – alone – any will or power to choose my attitudes or behavior. I had to consciously experience my desperate and helpless hopelessness to change, and to be empowered to act in my own best interests. My conscious and willing experience of my wretched pain opened my heart, and with the help of others, I experienced an intimacy beyond mental thought and reasoning, that began changing my perceptions, reactions and actions. Bathed in Their intimate Presence, I began to heal. And my life began to become a better and better place.

Today, we (Mom, Dad and me) seem to be as intimate and close as my level of conscious experience of my powerlessness. The myths disappear – and in my heart I can be what is real – their unconditionally beloved son.

Bill W. from Alcoholics Anonymous.
Our human resources, as marshalled by the will, were not sufficient; they failed utterly.
Lack of power, that was our dilemma. We had to find a power by which we could live, and it had to be a Power greater than ourselves.....As we felt new power flow in, as we enjoyed peace of mind, as we discovered we could face life successfully, as we became conscious of His Presence, we began to lose our fear of today, tomorrow, and the hereafter. We were REBORN.

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Saved by Love -- Daily Inspirations Through Others

Nothing we do, however virtuous, can be accomplished alone;

therefore, we are saved by love.
Reinhold Niebuhr

Over the last forty to fifty years, there have been major changes in the structure of our culture. Financial and educational opportunities have created more and more space between persons and their supportive others. Families become scattered all over the country and world – some see family members every couple of years – and childhood friends and acquaintances – never. The fabric and strength of human relationships have been sacrificed for progress, success, fame, and wealth – none of which brings any real closeness and intimacy – serenity or joy – any really deeper meaning to life.

We are forced to live alone – with human bodies passing and flailing about us – no real contact, caring, connection, warmth – we are forced to live disconnected -- alone.

Well, alone just doesn’t work. The massive distractions of our modern world may numb our brains enough to forget – that it’s not working. But then – something happens – flowers, clouds, a death, a birth, an unexpected something happens -- appears on the screens of our brains – and we remember – something just isn’t “right” – something’s missing – and we are remembering – what we forgot – and it’s important.

What is “it”?

Normally what happens next is that our phone rings, someone turns on a TV, a text message appears, and we forget – again. And sometimes – nothing happens – and we still remember – and we want something different – something real – something bigger than ourselves – love.

We begin to believe – and experience – that a love, greater than ourselves, might restore us to Life – at least for this moment, and for this breath – maybe -- maybe longer.

The material nature of our perceived world is an illusion – a mirage – in real terms it doesn’t exist. It can only anesthetize – not energize and enlighten.

Life melts in our hearts not in our heads. And when our hearts touch, something happens – we begin to see a path -- back home to our true and deeper selves – and we become amazed – with others -- along the way.

Today, let’s touch someone else -- with conscious, deliberate smiles -- with sincere and attentive ears -- with hearts opening wide and wider – rediscovering the beautiful place that love can build –that already is.

We can truly make life a better place – by love’s design.

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Raising the Shades with Spiritual Enlightenment -- Daily Inspirations

Before sunlight can shine through a window, the blinds must be raised.
American Proverb

Light – the presence of energy that reveals what is – colors, depth, space, hues of moments and breaths emerging on the surfaces of our brains – revealing something – nothing – everything.

We are looking for that something. From one day and time to the next – we are looking for different somethings. We don’t really know what we are looking for – does it even exist – is it hidden behind – beneath – inside of something – someone? We don’t know. This is the place to begin. I don’t know what or where or who I am looking for – there is a darkness.

In our unknowingness, something must change – something must move – an opening must form that exposes our brains to Light – spiritual enlightenment – a Presence beyond sight and sound – experienced with our hearts – Light that pulls ourselves back into our own consciousness – by allowing Their Presence to flow – into our hearts – illuminating our unthinking brains.

Before light can shine through a window, there must be a window.

How obvious? But missed. A window – an opening – the presence of open Presence – through which life can enter.

For some, it seems simple. A spiritual presence, with a spiritual guide, and there appears openings.

For some, more complex – a need for intense and consistent spiritual therapy – an IV line to our brains -- through which massive doses of Presence can flow – specifically into the missing voids of seething absence.

Reach out and touch others – smile, be present – and listen – messages, voices, intimate spiritual conversations, emerging, opening -- time stills -- Light shines -- and we see – more and more – what we were looking for --all along.

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Laying Our Lives at God's Feet -- Spiritual Enlightenment

My imperfections and failures are as much
a blessing from God as my successes and my talents,
and I lay them both at His feet.
Mahatma Gandhi

What if every morning, we received an email of God, labeled, “My Will for You Today”? And what if in the email, God told us everything we were supposed to do and everything that would happen? Wouldn’t that just be great?! It would take all the guess work out of life.

No. It would not be great. It would be like being given the answers for a pending test before the test. There would be no motivation to learn and grow.

With all the answers given, we would not bother to develop a relationship with God – and we would cease to become -- and be close.

The same is true of our imperfections and failures. They are our means of developing intimate Presence with God. Without them, our human brains would convince us that spiritual struggles with myself and efforts to grow – and become -- are unnecessary. And we would live lonely, meaningless lives -- without conscious Presence of a caring, loving God who brings all the pieces of the human experience into a spiritual whole.

“I lay them both at His feet.” It makes sense to lay our imperfections and failures, but why our successes and talents?

Our human brain is preoccupied with outcomes as a means of making ourselves “happy”—actually for protecting us from painful consequences – painful separation. The reality is that success and talent can be as much a trap, as imperfections and failures can be a gift.

Success can lull us into the illusion that we can control the outcomes of our lives – and that when we do, we will be happy. Both conclusions are false and extremely harmful.

We need to accept and experience our powerlessness in our failures -- see caring Presence in our successes – hear that Someone is looking out for our best interests and needs – and continue to surrender our outcomes His and Her loving care.

What we have placed at Their feet no longer has the power to control or threaten our serenity -- we can truly Be.

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Listening to Presence with Our Hearts -- Finding Daily Inspirations

There is a guidance for each of us, and by lowly listening we shall hear the right word…. Place yourself in the middle of the stream of power and wisdom which flows into your life. Then, without effort, you are impelled to truth and to perfect contentment.
Ralph Waldo Emerson

Each writer uses different words and combinations of words to express and communicate same and similar experiences. Words are receptacles of human energy, which can become filled with spiritual Presence energy and then lived beyond what we could even begin to ask for or think.

There is a higher Presence that resides and resonates within each of us. Hence writers have talked about recognizing and “worshipping” the God that is within all of us –individually and collectively.

That Presence – “a guidance for each of us” – is able to begin to clear our brains of mindless frightened chatter, and begin to reveal to us the higher meaning and direction of our lives – spiritual experiences leading to spiritual awakenings, resulting in spiritual enlightenment. With this guiding Presence, we become increasingly alive and aware.

Implied in these words is the necessity to experience, admit, and accept that of our own abilities, we cannot know! This is required in order to go to the next level.

“Lowly” simply means humble – an active spiritual awareness that we are unable to know and to do life alone -- and that there is Someone there – hidden behind rows and rows of thought within our brains – Someone who is speaking – caringly and lovingly to our hearts – when we can listen.

We are not alone.

As we learn to listen, we begin to hear the “right words”. Words again are containers full of energy. Distorted by our hidden pasts, the neural energy of words destroys and harm. Freed by conscious Presence with the God of our intimate experience, the energy of “right words” heals – spiritually transforms our perceptions and reactions into “rightness” or personal sanity and health.

To access this spiritual Presence on regular basis, we need to place ourselves into the very center of the spiritual stream of God’s Presence and spiritual enlightenment, which flows even now right through our lives – our conscious experiences of living.

It is critical to let God, our higher Presence, reveal this incredible stream of spiritual energy that is ever present and available to all of us.

When we learn to live within these spiritual experiences and Presence, we will find ourselves accessing an infinitely higher awareness, and experiencing a serenity that exceeds all human thinking – and WITHOUT EFFORT!

“Impossible”, says our brains. “Life is only as “good” as we make it,” -- one of the many lies received from our brains.

“Without effort” or effortless: The Bible says, “what man, by willing it to be so, can add one inch to his height?” We are powerless – alone. Intimately connected to our God, we become – merely by having and improving our conscious contact with Him and Her. Spiritual enlightenment and healing comes from conscious Presence with God – “not by our works, lest any man boast”

Let’s take some deep breaths – slow and easy – feeling the rhythm and motion of our bodies – being exactly where we are at this moment – unconditionally perfect, loved – and admired – by our loving higher Parents. We are not alone. Feel their Presence. Begin to allow their caring energy to flow through you – becoming engulfed in the steady glowing stream of their love. And listen – words will appear and begin to dissolve – the pure spirit that flows from Their heart will lift us from our worldly distractions – and we are becoming spiritually enlightened beyond our thoughts and human perceptions.

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When I Listen, God Speaks -- Facebook and Daily Inspirations

I am new to Facebook, so I am learning how to communicate within its contexts. I find myself listening to others’ words, and experiencing a higher consciousness of my self – especially when I share my own perceptions, and reactions – experience, strength, and hope. I have decided to share with you the gifts others have given me, with the hope there may be gifts in the Presence of these words for you.


Gratitude:

Not especially looking forward to working tomorrow...I
suppose I should be grateful I'll be getting time and a half. God, help me to be
a good employee and not lose my temper at work tomorrow, and help me tonight to
enjoy being at home!

Yes, you should – be grateful!!!! NOT!!!


For me, when I "should" on myself, I am not grateful but suppressing my conscious contact with my own feelings, and pretending that it is gratitude. For me, gratitude begins many times with consciously experiencing my discomfort and fear, connecting consciously with my higher power -- literature, others, meetings, journalling, meditation -- and then taking action -- next right or necessary thing, acting as if -- WHILE consciously feeling my feelings, and my God's Presence. It takes "practice" -- in my experience -- to make this a spiritual way of "living", but it happens.



Consciously feeling my feelings -- consciously connecting with my God -- consciously acting in trust, while feeling my feelings -- and then a higher Presence occurs -- an improved conscious relationship with my God -- and intuitively I experience that I am being loved and cared about – which is gratitude -- without needing reasoning or logic – without resisting my feelings.

Thanks for your honesty.


Aging:

“Depending on their outlook, people's old age will
dramatically differ, especially in terms of the richness and fulfillment they
will experience. Everything is up to our attitude, how we approach life. Do we
look at old age as a descending path to oblivion? Or is it a period in which we
can attain our goals and bring our lives to a rewarding, satisfying completion?”
Wisdom for Modern Life - Daisaku Ikeda

I experience that aging begins with the constriction of neural energy to control outcomes and relationships, which progressively cuts down my brain's capacity to maintain the biological network of my body, and hence it progressively deteriorates -- aging.

To slow down or modify the process, I experience a need to reduce my brain's constriction by improving my conscious contact with my higher power's Presence. The constriction is the result of separation from my higher power caused by my attachment, fixation, and dependency on outcomes as a means of control and perceptual "survival".

Humility:

" A conceited person never gets anywhere
because he thinks he's already there. "
Rev Run

Maybe: A humble person never gets anywhere because he/she IS already there.

Outcomes:

It's amazing what a good night's sleep can do for you -- things
nothing else can…. I waste more time trying to force myself to stay awake and
get something finished than I'd gain by just going to bed, getting at least a
little sleep, and then tackling the project again. But I forget that --
everytime.

I struggle with the" same" thing. I am working on becoming consciously connected to the parts of me that are resisting each other and producing conflicted outcomes. My experience is that there are lost selves attempting to return "Home". Really -- maybe -- a better outcome than reaching an externalized goal.

Mistakes:

“If you have made mistakes, even serious ones,
there is always another chance for you. What we call "failure" is not the
falling down but the staying down.”
Mary Pickford.
I need to remember
this. Until I am willing to do something badly, I will never make progress. Like
working with my new airbrush.

Maybe -- there are no mistakes -- only misunderstood outcomes. With my higher power, there seems to be no waste. Everything seems to be deliberately planned and used to bring me to better and better versions of my self. I see mistakes when I can only see the details and not Their loving, caring destiny for me. The bestest gift of any painful event is the intimate closeness I can experience when I dare to feel consciously my exposed sadness and fear -- in Their Presence.

The "Right One":

Hope this might be true.
On this day, God
wants you to know...
that the way you know you have found the right one is
the inexpressible comfort of feeling safe with the person. Having neither to
weigh thoughts nor measure words, but pouring them all right out, just as they
are, chaff and grain together; certain that a faithful hand will take and sift
them, keep what is worth keeping, and then with the breath of kindness blow the
rest away.
Dinah Craik

I experience the term "the right one" as the addictive obsession that drove my disease of codependency until recovery. "The right one" was always someone outside of me who was going to fill the gaping hole in my soul -- do for me what I could not do for myself.

I was taught that I am "the right one" for me, when I am consciously connected to myself and to my higher power's Presence. I am given a "new pair of glasses" with which to see others in the external world, and it allows me to experience the available closeness, accepting unconditionally any separation, while loving and admiring the godself in every person. I do not have to reject or abandon others for my or their humanness .

If I am not my own "right one", there can be ultimately no real connection and closeness with others. To ask someone to be "the right one" is ultmately to doom them to be "the wrong one.

Forgiveness:

Interesting, since I had a moment today where a lot of
old resentments came bubbling to the surface. And yes, forgiveness can be very
hard.
On this day, God wants you to know...
that although forgiveness is
very hard, it is necessary. Holding onto anger and old hurts hardens your heart
and hurts only you. Ask for help in letting go of the anger. Ask to see the
situation through the eyes of compassion. Allow yourself to feel the lightness
of forgiveness.

Maybe forgiveness is not really hard for us to do. Maybe it is impossible! The normal act of forgiveness I experience for humans is actually suppression and denial of feelings to a point of numbness -- which is then called forgiveness. Really it is a growing sesspool of decomposing selves. And I am powerless to stop it.

Resentment for me is the constriction and resistance of feeling to protect me from experiencing separation -- abandonment and abuse -- that occurred in the past, and that I am anticipating in the future -- instinctively, at a primitive brain level. No amount of logic or reasoning can reach this part of my brain. So I am helplessly flailing about in desperate anger, trying to avoid the pain and dismemberments of my past.

For me, spirituality --conscious intimate connection with my God -- is the only way my primitive and rational brains have begun to reconnect, and I begin to stop inflicting the harm of my past on myself -- over and over and over again.
The Twelve Steps are spiritual guide -- for me -- for going back to my past and having my God “change my outcomes” – inserting Their Presence. Resentment is a symptom of my wounded separation, and when this separation is replaced with conscious Presence, I do not have to forgive -- I no longer have the pain and fear that produces resentment.

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Finding Wonders of Daily Inspirations in Darkness and Silence

Everything has its wonders, even darkness and silence, and I learn, whatever state I may be in, therein to be content.

Helen Keller

I have always been impressed with the wisdom and depth of Helen Keller's words. Here we have someone who was blind and deaf -- absent of the two main physical sources of sensation and awareness -- who was able to "see and hear" way beyond what is normal for human beings. The depth of her vision and insight, and her ability to hear our humanity in her dark and silent world reminds us that we do not have to be limited by our humanness.

"Everything has its wonder" -- in every situation there is the unknown. Our human condition can paint pain and dread on to the canvasses of our brains. We can expect only the worst -- only what our shame and separation describes as "what we deserve!"

"I wonder what horrible thing is going to happen to me to day." Prerecorded, programmed messages on the filters of our brains that tells us, "it's coming -- and it's going to be bad!"

How do we get from here to "wonder"?

My shame and guilt are the results of separation and experiences of abandonment from others. They have programmed our brains this way. To change this, we must become connected -- intimately -- to a higher Presence -- a "God" of our life experience. In this relationship, we can begin to take on "God's Vision" of what is, and who we are. His (and Her) views of life and of us are very different from ours -- full of wonder and expectant joy -- wondering what we are going to do next -- like a parent watches their infant, toddler -- child.

"Even in darkness and silence" Maybe more accurately, in darkness and silence we begin to experience depths of true wonder. Many times we become so distracted by the blaring noises, and blinding lights of our world, that any possible wonder is drowned out by sheer overstimulation.

Actually, my experience is that we need to return and be returned to the basics of darkness and silence so we can find wonder, Presence, and hope. Out of this spiritual darkness comes a different light that only our hearts can see -- a still small voice that only our hearts can hear -- in silence.

The irony is that the human brain is programmed to avoid and condemn darkness and silence as if it were an evil plague. It's time to receive spiritual enlightenment and Presence that recreates our being in the dark and silent womb of unknowing -- the wisdom and intimacy that is born out of not knowing.

As we begin to live in this new perceptions -- with these new spiritual senses -- we begin to see and hear past what the brain defines as what is, moving into contentment and serenity, and eventually into love, Presence, and expectant wonderment.

"What's next! Something wonderful is getting ready to happen!"

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Self-Forgiveness Begins with the Spiritual Enlightenment of God's Presence

Sometimes the past is so painful to think about that your only salvation lies in complete surrender to the mercy of God. Only in Him are you given the strength and courage it takes to keep on walking when every step is hard. But, finally, after what can seem like an endless journey in the darkness of your own regret, you come upon the light again. You have no doubt who has set you free, for only One who is author of forgiveness would give you still another chance.
Marianne Williamson

The past can be painful, whether the outcomes were desired or undesired. In my experience, accomplishments frequently reminded me that I was expecting a certain event or series of events to make me happy, and when they failed, I was left even more hopelessly lost.


Ultimately, I am forced to surrender – to stop buying the illusion of my possible control of what is, and of how I will perceive and feel as a result. I am powerless – I cannot control what is or how I react to what is – the past reoccurs on the screens of my mind as if current and happening. These inner images are programmed to continue repeating themselves indefinitely if not changed.

I am left no choice but to turn to the loving and merciful Presence of God – to change and spiritually heal my experience and perceptions. In His (and Her) Presence I am given the sanity of strength and courage to keep putting one thought, and one feeling – one moment and one breath at a time – in front of the other.


My journey seems endless because it is recycling my past -- over and over again -- with greater and greater darkness – repeating abandonment and separation. The Light – God’s loving Presence – begins to glow – and the walls of my inner prison begin to dissolve. I am being taught and reprogrammed to see me with God’s eyes – and They hold nothing against me – They are teaching me to experience Their truth – and I am able, with their love and caring, to forgive and admire myself – and love me with Their unconditional love – and admiration.


We really are Their children – created out of their infinite love.

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I've Been Disconnected -- Daily Inspirations and Presence

(From a relationship group in 2008.)
I WANT

Better acceptance of myself so I can…
work through my own guilt and shame…
better insight to establish… and maintain healthy… lasting
relationships… with healthy people…
greater self awareness in relationships with others…
acceptance and flow of life and events…
to be conscious of the Presence of a Higher Power … so that I
will intuitively know how to handle situations … that
used to baffle me… decrease the trajectory of my
overreaction…

I don’t know?

Life, especially as affected by childhood traumas, can be an ongoing process of becoming disconnected. Every time someone disconnected from and abandoned us, and every time we disconnected from and abandoned someone else, we became more and more disconnected from our selves.

Into these holes we attempted to insert knowledge and understanding to fill the emptiness, and give direction. Within our relationships, we ended up like blind persons attempting to fly a plane by sound. Disconnected from our sense of conscious Presence, we did not know -- if we were up or down -- where the other planes were or weren’t -- inevitably the flights of our relationships almost always ended in deathly crashes of selves.

We desperately believed that our problem was a lack of information -- the real problem was an absence of Presence-Connection with the God of a personal experience.

In the absence of personal Presence, we continue to lose parts of ourselves -- like having the blood flow cut off from parts of our body. We have lost major parts of ourselves, but we can be restored -- by reconnecting these parts – lost selves -- back to a Higher Presence. God’s messengers of loving Presence are here – whenever we are available – wherever we are listening – whenever we open our hearts to the care and love waiting – just outside our minds.

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